Ego and the Comfort Zone

11th day of #Blogchatter daily write challenge  

When we think of people with an ego, we immediately think of  those with puffed up self image bordering on arrogance and who are dismissive of other people. Therefore, I was surprised when I read somewhere, the proposition that the ego can adversely affect those who are seemingly having low self esteem.As for instance, there are persons in the audience at a conference who are itching to ask a question after a presentation by the speaker but would never do so because the ego says "you may look foolish". You may be ridiculed, it cautions. Ego ensures that we do not get out of our comfort circles; take risks or try new things. 

Children have no such problems. They are not afraid to make mistakes .You find them easily picking up many languages or skills at play. In order to be effective, we need to be able to come out of our comfort circle. We need to ask ourselves "Is our ego trying to protect us from ridicule and in turn  stopping us from trying out new things?" If the answer is 'yes', then perhaps we need to just thank the ego, calm it down and go ahead and do what we are fearful of, anyway!

When the Asian literary society (ALS) FB group expanded its vision to commence and include the "performing Arts" group in its fold, I joined group but was reluctant to sing in the beginning. I had been drawn to songs and music even as a little kid. I used to purchase little film lyrics books or note down lyrics in a note book , after listening to songs on the radio and sing along. The craze and love for music continued through youth and middle age. But actual singing was more or less confined to the interiors of the bathroom. In the ALS Performing Arts group, everyone was singing along with Karaoke music. This scared me, as I thought that I wouldn't be able to get the timing right. 

Therefore, although I had become a member, I refrained from singing in the group for a long time . However, I sang a couple of songs without music and posted them on my Facebook page. Ms Asha Kodamanchili, who was at that time, an admin in the Haven International on listening to them, had words of encouragement . She urged me to sing songs with karaoke music. But at that time, I did not have the courage to do it. 

Later, I started experimenting and started participating in the group's daily challenge of singing continuously for five days on various themes such as "Devotional", "Love", "Sad', "Party" songs etc. At this point, although I was comfortable with the melodious songs, I was wary of singing the fast "Party songs" that also required lot of 'letting go' and singing with abandon. With time, I believe that I have been able to beat to some extent, the diffidence towards fast numbers. A lot of credit for this goes to the dynamic admin team and encouraging members of the group.

Coming out of the comfort zone gives you a lot of confidence. Although I had taken my own experience as an example, anyone at any age can achieve big things in any discipline by coming out of the comfort zone. As for example, new courses can be taken up by employees to further their career. An executive can start speaking before audiences confidently. A house wife can resume her dancing passion after gap of many years or a person can change his or her career if finding the present one dull and unfulfilling.  The ego which operates in a repetitive, automatic, predictable manner aims to protect us from perceived harm. Handling ego appropriately instead of fighting with it, is the key to becoming the best we can be!