Act Now Before it's Too Late

20 th day of #Blogchatter daily write challenge  

Dr Mathew, the Chief  Trainer  of  a  Manager Development institute based out of Muvattupuzha, Ernakulam District, Kerala, has facilitated a few training programs for BEML during 1998-2000.  One of his flagship programs was for employees who were due for retirement in the next five years. The program sought to acknowledge their long service to the company and also give them inputs on psychological, physical, social and financial matters to enable them to handle the post retirement phase effectively. The programs were well received and appreciated by the participants.

At that time as Head of the Department of Training and Development, I used to sit in on major programs to see the impact of the programs and also get inspired myself from the content of some ace trainers. An absorbing, yet very touching story Dr Mathew used to relate was of his mother as she lay in the coffin after death. His father, a person not known to outwardly demonstrate his love or tender side, suddenly burst out crying " Elizabeth, Elizabeth, Elizabeth you have been a wonderful wife and mother! You sacrificed so much for us whole through your life. Yet, I couldn't tell you even once how much you meant to me, to all of us!" He kept weeping repeating similar lines. 

Mathew then looked at the participants and said "Don't wait till the death of people. Tell them you care, when they are alive." It is very sound advice. Yet most of us find it, difficult to follow. For one thing, we tend to believe that our deaths or that of our dear ones will not happen in the near future. Further, In India, culturally we tend to take things for granted and are reluctant to openly acknowledge the good deeds and gestures of near and dear ones . While going through the ups and downs of life, one tends to look at the faults of others rather than their plus points and it is only in their absence that the good things about them and how much we miss them  hits us in the face. 

As I pondered over the subject of discussion, it struck me that it is not just about appreciating/acknowledging a dear one but spending sufficient time with the people you care for or look up to is equally important. We tend to postpone things to a later date and then it can be too late. Some things of course happen unexpectedly and are beyond our control. As for example V. Bimal my colleague in Hyundai Motor India Ltd worked in sales. He was very effective in his work and was instrumental in creating some high levels of customer delight which I have recorded in an earlier blog. (Can Read here ) It is also included in my book " Straight from the Heart- Thoughts and Experiences of an HR Professional". 

Apart from being great as an executive in his chosen field, Bimal had a special place in my heart also for the kindness and regards he extended when I was serving in Chennai. As I was living alone, (my family stayed back in Bangalore) Bimal invited me to his house for dinner and I had met his wife and school going daughter two to three times. Whenever he went abroad on personal or official trip, he would invariably bring for me a little memento as a remembrance of the occasion. 

When I retired and left Chennai for Bangalore,  I invited Bimal and his family to come and visit us in Bangalore. Destiny did not allow this to happen though. It was with deep shock that I came to learn of his demise due to covid complications in June 2021. As a person a lot younger than me, the last thing one would have expected is for him to leave us so early. A friendly, ever helpful personality Bimal is missed a lot by many friends and family. His friends circle was far and wide. Condolences had poured in from Bulgaria where he had done his engineering.   

Mr Brahmadathan, retired chief engineer, Kerala State Electricity Board had made a mark not only in his profession but in a number of other areas like sports, yoga and education. He represented his electricity board in the National Badminton championships of the electricity boards. He was instrumental in starting free yoga coaching centres in Thrissur to encourage and develop the practice of of yoga in his city. 

He was the Founder Executive Director of Vidya Academy of Science and Technology, Thrissur which has today grown in to a big, reputed institution in the state. The impact he has made on society can be seen by the fact that even after 12 years since his crossing over, every year on 17th September, Brahma Smriti is observed by the Vidya Academy remembering K.R. Brahmadathan as the philosopher and guiding light that made all this possible. (Can read here )

Mr Brahmadathan also took the initiative to develop a township in Poomala, Thrissur district with the concept of independent houses owned by senior citizens with all back up facilities so that they can stay there with the like minded, in camaraderie and peace of mind. They could visit children and stay with them for short periods and return when they wished to do so. He was also a lot into spirituality which stood him in good stead during the trials and tribulations of life. I was fortunate to have access to the noble soul (married to his wife's  elder sister's daughter) and enjoyed discussions with him on spirituality and yoga. 

Whenever, we visited his house for a couple of days, he would invite me to his yoga center to practice yoga. I would decline saying I would take leave, come for a week or two and learn it properly. However, this never happened as the matter kept getting postponed during my hectic corporate tenure. Before, we knew it, he had left for his heavenly abode. One thing I will always regret is not having spent more time in discussions and interactions with this multifaceted, inspiring personality.    

So, there you have it readers, the message is loud and clear. Do take the initiative in respect of those important people in your life and "Act now, before it's too late..."