Divorce

 The week's IndiSpire prompt reads as follows: Divorce affects the social, mental and physical health of aChild. Agree or disagree? #divorce

To my mind, the "agree or disagree" question, in the proposition appears to be  knave, insensitive or both. .Of course divorce affects! It is not something that is debatable.Divorce affects a child badly and leaves scars on him/her for a life time.When even eating something that does not agree with one's body affects a child physically and mentally; what can be said of a matter that culminates in having to choose one parent over the other, listening to barbs of relatives and friends, emotional blackmailing by the parent with whom the child lives etc.It is a wonder and big achievement that the child is even able to restore normalcy and go on with life in the mainstream.

The small mercies today, is that in the present times there are more divorces, so a small child is atleast able to comprehend to some extent as to what is happening. There are more discussions on the subject today  on TV and he/she can find other kids going through similar trauma, pain and feelings of inadequacy. What if the divorce happened in the sixties? The plight of the child would have been a lot worse.

Divorces could adversely affect children to such an extent that the child who was in the top rung in performance at school slips to the bottom half. His personality could change from being docile to aggressive or from an extrovert to an introvert, completely withdrawing into his shell. The child avoids social situations in order to avoid embarrassing questions from every Tom, Dick and Harry. If the child lives with the mother even a nuetral everyday question like " What is your father?"can be uncomfortable and painful ( atleast to the child of the earlier era).The child may resort to binge eating to compensate for the emotional problems ending up over weight or become under weight losing all interest in food and life in general.

Given the present lifestyles and life priorities, divorce may become inevitable in some cases when living together becomes a  psychological,/physical torture and the divorce may be in the interests of the children as well. However, the divorce decision should not be taken casually or in a  frivolous manner by the two adults without giving due consideration to the physical, emotional and social impact on the little ones. Infact I had written a poem echoing these sentiments some time back in Malayalam with an English translation-"We want you Both". Readers may like to visit there, clicking this link....

https://rajeevianlinesandverses.blogspot.in/2016/11/we-want-you-both.html